sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
