Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
