its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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