Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
