at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
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juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
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He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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