that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
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First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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