At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
