Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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