I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
