No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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