I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
