I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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