Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize