i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
What a dumb baby whore.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
