Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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