Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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