I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
be right there i have to get my cape
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
