Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You've changed since you got that strap on
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Nobody cheats on THIS.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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