just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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