so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
