seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
