Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
