so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
