Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Randomize
