All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
