Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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