508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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