I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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