So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
my poor anus
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
