This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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