I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
love makes seman taste better
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
