Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
