So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
