Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize