At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
