So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
