i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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