Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
she smelled like a LAN party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize