I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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