If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize
