If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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