I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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