So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
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I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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