Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize