Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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