so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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