Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize