That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
