hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I'm always down for nudity.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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