i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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